How many times have you ever felt like you have failed at something? If you were me, the answer can sometimes be many. It’s easy to get caught up in those failures, and let them bring you down. But hopefully, you can learn from each perceived failure and turn it into something good. Some of my biggest failures, have brought about the biggest changes, and even success, in my life.
For example, last weekend I should have celebrated by 6th wedding anniversary. But about 5 weeks before the wedding, I found out some things about my fiance that I could not accept, and we called off the wedding. I had so many emotions about the whole experience, such as self-doubt, anger, sadness, etc. and also felt like a failure: to my self, to my friends and family, and just in my whole decision making process. But what I failed to see at the time, and have come to realize, it that in my “failure” of an engagement/wedding, I was protected from a life that was not supposed to be, from a man I was not supposed to be with, and I have grown so much personally and emotionally from that experience, that I have become a much stronger and better person. I was also able to later help friends that went through similar situations; what a blessing that was. The whole “failure” turned into a blessing/success.
Now I will tell you that in the years that followed, I sometimes found myself looking back, focused on the failure, wondering how my life would have been different, and occasionally getting caught up in the “failure” of my life plan (i.e. not being married with 2.5 kids by the time I’m 30). I would get all depressed thinking about it all. I would constantly compare my life with those of my friends around me, and get stuck in the feeling sorry for myself rut. But in the last year or two, something inside of me has changed. I am no longer focused on the failure aspect of it, and am now more forward focused. I look forward to finding whoever it is that God has for me to be with. I look forward to using my current independence to do the things I want to do, and be able to have the freedom to do what I want, when I want, without having to worry about other people. I don’t want to dwell on the “what ifs” and “what should have beens” and “what I wanted to have happened by nows”. I want to look ahead and embrace whatever is coming next.
Do you focus on your failures or are you more forward focused? Describe a time when a failure turned out to be a blessing in disguise.
This post is part of a month-long series, A-Z, that I am participating in for the month of April. You can learn more about it by clicking on the link over on the right sidebar.