Ask me Anything

Well, I usually participate in Five Question Friday each week.  But as I looked at the questions on the host site, I just wasn’t feeling like they related to me much at all.  So I am leaving it open to all of you, to ask me anything.  I will answer back in a blog post (of course giving you a shout out).

Today I’m going to spend most of the day getting blood work, running errands, going to the gym, and my favorite part will be getting an hour long massage.  I am WAY overdue and since my back has been hurting, I figured this could help.   I hope you all enjoy your Friday.

 

let the questioning commence………..

Ask Me – Question 5

 

 

 

Today’s “ASK ME” question is:  ”Would you be happier if you could be set for life financially or if you could have a wonderful husband who is everything you ever wanted and makes you sooo happy (knowing that his life would end in 5 years)?”

This question was from my great friend Cathi.

 

 

Why can’t I have both???!!  LOL.  Cathi has heard all my guy drama over the years, the happy times, the heart break, etc. But if I really think about it, my choice would always be to have a wonderful husband, even if he would die in 5 years.  I’m reminded of the quote by Alfred Lord Tennyson:

‘Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.

I have always dreamed of getting married and having my own family. And so far it has not gone according to my plan, lol.  But I have not given up home overall.  There are some days where I am more frustrated than others about being single, or having a bad date and thinking why do I bother.  I just need to remind myself that the “right guy” is out there somewhere, and having gone through all the crap I have gone through, I hope it will help me appreciate him more when I do meet him. I know what I want in a relationship and I think I know myself better now, which will help me to better prepare myself for a committed relationship and be able to give all of myself to that person.  I want to know and experience that true and unconditional love for someone and feel that in return.  It is worth more to me that all the financial stability, even in this rough economic time.   Don’t get me wrong, I would like to not have to worry about how I’m going to pay my bills and have a little bit in savings to fall back on, but in the end, money can never by love.   

Thanks for the great question Cathi

**This is part of a series I am doing where you, my wonderful readers, can ask me anything you want, whether in my comments section or using my BLOG THIS page.  I will then answer your question in a blog post and link back to your blog.**

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• A different kind of 5QF (staceyarcher.wordpress.com)
• Ask Me – Question 4

Ask Me – Question 4

 

 

 

Today’s post question was from Patti : What do you like most about living in Socal and what do you miss most about back East?

 

 

 

 

I used to get asked this question a lot when I first moved out here 5 years ago, along with “What made you move out here?”.  I moved here in March 2006 because I was offered a job working with abused and neglected children in a group home.  On top of that, they were also teen mothers and/or pregnant teens.  I felt that God had put a calling on my heart to come out here and serve these young girls and help them to learn how to trust adults in a healthy way, and to learn how to live independently and to raise their children.  The offer to work out here came almost a year after my engagement had been broken off.  I had decided that I had enough disappointment and bad experiences in my life and had been wanting a change, not just in my scenery/location, but just overall, within myself and my life.  So I happily welcomed the job offer and the chance to start over in a new state.  For the first year I lived in California, my job was my life.  They had us working about 73 hours per week, and it was a live-in position, so it was basically 24/7.  On my days off, I typically was catching up on sleep or trying to branch out off campus with some of the other staff, to see what all Southern California had to offer.  It wasn’t until I no longer worked at the group home, that I really got to start seeing all the sites here, and feeling like my life was starting over.

I chose to stay here, and not return back to NY, where I had been born and raised, and spent my entire life.  And I’m glad I stayed.  For starters, I grew up in a really, really small town, where you knew everyone and everything.  The weather was terrible. You had winter for 6-8 months, and it would get to below zero temperatures, then the spring would be very rainy, with lots of mud and varying temperatures.  Then the 2-3 months of summer consisted of very humid, muggy days.  My favorite season was Fall.  I loved the change in the temperature, to warm but often crisp, the light breezes, and the changing colors of the leaves on the trees.  Here in Los Angeles, we don’t really have Fall; we basically have spring/summer all year round, with a touch of rainy/gloomy for the winter/early spring.  I love the weather, most of the time. It lets you have the freedom to do more things outdoors, and is just overall much better for my mood.

Another great thing about living in Los Angeles/southern California, is that there is so much diversity and so many things to do.  Back home, I was surrounded by all white people, and we had no types of ethnic influence, nor any ethnic restaurants.  When I moved out here, I was immediately exposed to so many different cultures, which I love.  And I started branching out with my taste in food.  I want to try it all!  And I want to try to learn new languages.

As far as things to do here, I love that I am 30 minutes from the beach, an hour or two to the mountains, and to the desert.  I can experience all 3 in a day if I wanted to.  And there are so many tourist attractions, such as Disneyland, Hollywood, lots of museums, sports arenas, etc. You name it, and it’s probably here, or close by here.

There really isn’t much I miss about NY, other than the people.  Most all of my family still lives there.  It’s sad that we see each other only once every couple of years.  But with things like email, Facebook, and Skype (video chat), it is much easier now to stay in touch with them. I had some great friends back home, but I think me being here has kind of made me “out of sight, out of mind” with them, which has been hard.  I am going for a visit in October and hope that I can reconnect with some of my old friends.  And hopefully, it will still be Fall in NY, and I will get to see the glorious colors of the changing leaves and breathe in the crisp, clean, smog-less air.

**This is part of a series I am doing where you, my wonderful readers, can ask me anything you want, whether in my comments section or using my BLOG THIS page.  I will then answer your question in a blog post and link back to your blog.**

Ask Me – Question 3

Today’s question in my “Ask Me” series is : Which place is on the top of your list to one day visit?

It was from my blog buddy BabyBird.

I love to travel and wish I could see the entire world.  I miss places that I have already been to, and the people that I have met there, and I yearn for new places, new experiences and new friends.

I think my top place to visit would be Italy.  I can’t narrow it down to just one particular city.  Italy has many great and famous cities, each full of so much culture and history.  Part of my ancestry is from a small town in Italy, so I think it would be so cool to be able to travel there one day just to see where my relatives came from.  On a random note, I just love how it is shaped like a boot…LOL.  Oh me and my love of shoes.  And I bet the food is incredible!

Other places that are up there on my travel list include: Madrid, Paris, India, South Africa, Aruba, and Hawaii.  I also have blogged about this before, but I have children I sponsor through Compassion International.  One lives in Peru, the other in Brazil.  I would so love to be able to one day go on a sponsor tour and meet both of my kids.  It is nice to be able to get letters from them and watch them grow up in pictures, but to actually meet them in person, give them hugs and kisses, and just spend some time with them would be the most amazing thing to me.  Unfortunately, each trip is about $4000 plus the airfare to get to the departure city.  Working in a non-profit organization as a social worker for a state that is super broke, does not lend itself well to helping me realize this dream.  Maybe I should play the lottery?  LOL.

What place is on the top of your list for travel?

**This is part of a series I am doing where you, my wonderful readers, can ask me anything you want, whether in my comments section or using my BLOG THIS page.  I will then answer your question in a blog post and link back to your blog.**

Ask Me – Question 2

 

 

 

 

 

Today’s question in this series is “Who Inspires You?” which was from my blogging buddy  - Joss.

 

 

 

 

INSPIRE –verb (used with object)

1. to fill with an animating, quickening, or exalting influence.

2. to produce or arouse (a feeling, thought, etc.): to inspireconfidence in others.

3. to fill or affect with a specified feeling, thought, etc.

There are so many people that inspire me actually.  For starters, all of you, my readers and blog buddies.  I know for me it was hard to build up the confidence I needed to even start a blog, and then worry about who would read it, what they would think, what would people think about my posts, etc.  When the daily challenge put out a post about getting blog buddies, I started meeting many people who felt just like I did at one point or another, and yet, they continues to get past their fears, and bare their souls with each post. There are days that trying to find something to blog about are harder than others, but you all keep at it and in turn, inspire me to keep going as well.

Another source of inspiration to me have been some of the women I have met through my church.  I did not grow up in a Christian home and was never really taught much about religion.  I have met some amazing Godly women that have come along side of me and encouraged me and have been excellent models of Christ’s love and Christ-like behavior, showing me the kind of woman that I aspire to be like.

Finally, another source of inspiration for me comes from the clients that I work with.   I am a service coordinator/social worker for developmentally disabled young adults.  They are all diagnosed with mental retardation, autism, seizure disorders, or cerebral palsy.  Often they have multiple diagnosis and some are very medically fragile.  I have about 80 clients currently, and I see them all a couple times per year.  One part of my job is to constantly be reviewing their current situation and needs, and helping them set goals each year that they work on.   Most all of them have touched my heart in some way.  It is awesome to meet with them and see their progress, whether small or great, as they work towards their goals.  Some of them that are more high functioning, really have amazing dreams and desires and have such a determination to be as independent as possible.  They inspire me to be the best service coordinator I can be for them.

Thanks for the great question Joss.  Now I ask you all, who inspires you?

 

**This is part of a series I am doing where you, my wonderful readers, can ask me anything you want, whether in my comments section or using my BLOG THIS page.  I will then answer your question in a blog post and link back to your blog.**

Ask Me – Question 1

Today’s question, where you can ask me anything, is from my blog buddy Marie.

She asks:  ”Is it difficult to live with roommates?”

Currently, I live in a house with 5 other girls.  But I have had many different living situations in my life involving roommates, such as sharing a room with my sister, sharing a college dorm room, living in a sorority house in college with 20+ other girls, living with a boyfriend, and sharing a room with a female roommate in a 2 bedroom apartment with 4 girls.  So I think I have encountered all aspects of roommate situations.

There are positives and negatives about roommates.  Here is what I think off the top of my head:

Positives:

• You are not alone – you have built in company/companionship
• You can develop/deepen your relationship to the person/people you are living with
• There’s someone around you can talk to
• You can always learn something from the person
• There is hardly a dull moment
• You can split the household chores
• Rent is cheaper

Negatives:

• You are never alone – there is always someone around or will be coming home soon, and often times they bring others with them
• If you don’t have your own bedroom, you have a serious lack of privacy
• You have no control over other people.   That means that there will be days where your roommates leave their messes anywhere, dirty dishes pile up, people can be really loud when you are trying to sleep, doors get left unlocked, your stuff gets moved or taken, etc.
• Too many people to fight over the bathroom with

With all my living situations, I have found that it’s best to talk about expectations and set some house rules from the beginning.  That way everyone can have input and be on the same page.  Having some sort of cleaning schedule and laundry schedule is also very helpful, so that you know when things need to be done, and they can be divided up equally.  Also, try to live with people that share similar values and personalities.  When conflicts arise (not if, since it most definitely will) always try to talk about it with the person.  That is one area that I think I have grown the most in over the last few years.  Usually, I have been passive-aggressive or will just keep it all in and then have some big blow up after too much has bottled up.  Now, if I am getting upset with someone or have an issue, I try to work it out with the person before it gets too out of control.  And I am also more open to feedback from a roommate as well.  I know that I am not perfect, far from it, and that there are things that I do or say that can bug people.  Trust me, when you live with someone, they see all your faults and you see theirs.  I asked all my roommates to let me know if/when I do something to them or that they didn’t like, because sometimes I don’t even know that it bugged them.

I have my days where I definitely miss having my own apartment and privacy and most of all control.  But that can get lonely at times.  I like having roommates to talk to, share life with and learn from.

Does anyone have any other positives or negatives about roommates?

Thanks Marie for the great question!

 

**This is part of a series I am doing where you, my wonderful readers, can ask me anything you want, whether in my comments section or using my BLOG THIS page.  I will then answer your question in a blog post and link back to your blog.**